I notice I have gotten more and more clumsy.
No, maybe clumsy is not the word.

Here it goes,
Yesterday I was watching drama on my computer.
A bug or whatsoever flew by.
I was so worked up; I knock down the bowl containing all my nail polish bottles.
Even the nail polish remover fell off the table.
The speaker almost broke.
And I screamed so loud that I woke all my family members.
They almost thought our house was on fire.
Maybe I overreacted, but I just couldn't stand insects flying around.
I freak out at the sight of any flying insects.
Especially moth, it's so freaking HUGE and UGLY.

Right after that, I run into my room and hide.
My sister asked me to help her get a t-shirt.
So while i'm still searching for the shirt...
She said:"got something flew by".
Again, I couldn't control my body.
I moved back & turned, and almost knock my head against the sharp ends.
Luckily, I stopped before knocking against it, but still I got a blue black on my leg. -_-

I dare not step out of my room.
I even start complaining:"the bug is so smart, I couldn't even find it anywhere".
My sister laughed:"where got people say bug smart?"
Sheesh.

Sometimes I just wonder why i'm so blur.
And why I do weird stuff that makes people laugh.
Andy called me dodo, which means dumb dumb.
He said I got a blur face AND looks like i'm going to do something stupid soon.
WHAT THE HECK.
one day when i see him i swear i will strangle him to death.

anyway didn't notice today is 22nd
until i look at the calendar.
wao, i though x'mas is next week.
so actually it is only 3 days away.

I must say, i will never like x'mas anymore.
x'mas actually symbolise happiness
a season which people send good wishes to others
or should i say a season to bring people happiness
it was a season to bring people together
or to remind everyone how important each and everyone means to one another

But what is x'mas to me?
It reminded me of the pain that i wanted to forget.
It reminded me of the memories that i wanted to erase.
I don't expect any good stuff to happen to me this x'mas.
Santa Claus will never give you the present that you wanted.
Because it was, just a fairy-tale story made up for kids.

At one point, I was just like a little kid.
Trying to believe that good things will happen to me.
To believe is such a pain.
Now, I rather not.

For now,
If i have one wish.
I wish that i never knew what is x'mas
And I wish it never came into my life.